As of right now, I am no longer using the word won’t in my writing, and I shall try to eliminate it from my speech. For far too long has this bastardization lived within our beautiful tongue, and I will do my part to expunge it.

Oh, it started innocently enough, wynnot sometime i the mid-16th century. I don’t blame them, they had a different sort of English then, and I think we can all get behind the letter y. It is rather beautiful. Later it transformed into wonnot, and I cannot stress how grateful I am that we left that abomination behind. It sounds like a double-negative, and you know people would say it so it sounded like “won’t not”. I get shivers just thinking about it.

By 1667 we had fallen all the way down, and wont was being printed. A tragedy of epic proportions.

So join me in this crusade. Oh certainly, we might be fighting three-hundred fifty years of combined learning, but we can do it. We are strong. We can’t and willn’t be stopped from the pursuit of our noble goal.